How to Give Billions of Dollars To Eliminate Starvation

1) Neither the principle nor interest will be released for two hundred years.

2) In return for collecting one percent at the end of this period, the bank agrees to undertake any reasonable and legal tax avoidance techniques to empower the highest possible value of the account that these enclosed funds engender. Costs for doing so shall be absorbed by the bank in the interest of promoting and participating in the intent of this document and its successful execution, which is to feed starving people. The bank's fee at the end of the two hundred years is to be one percent of the total at that time.

3) Should the bank be sold or be found insolvent, the bank agrees that the principal and interest will be paid to the nearest legitimate competing bank organization before any other active or dormant account within the bank's care on one day following the date that a decision has been arrived at by competent authority within or without the bank that such a sale, merger, or bank failure will take place or has taken place.

In the event of merger, the funds can remain provided that the chief operating officer of the combined organization warrants and guarantees that the full force of this document, and its clear intent, will be honored first and foremost among all accounts in the care or command of the bank. Should the bank decline to honor the intent of this fund, all accumulated funds will be transferred immediately to the nearest competing bank not owned by the same or affiliated corporation as the currently participating bank.

4) At the end of the two hundred year period, the bank is assigned up to one tenth of one percent of the total accumulated funds to be directed towards identifying the poorest one percent or ten thousand families of the populace within 1,250 miles of the bank who are living below the poverty line, whichever is greater. Recipients must be willing to state within a period of one year of this fund's first maturation, in writing or aloud to an appointee of the bank, how they intend to enjoy one third of their share and how they will invest the other two thirds for growth. This one tenth of one percent is in addition to the one percent ultimately assigned to the bank for banking fees and administration. Geographically moving the fund for purpose of manipulating ultimate distribution is considered a nullifying breach of this contract.

5) An additional ninety-seven percent of the total account is to be divided equally amongst the poorest two percent or ten thousand families, whichever is greater, that the bank has identified, and who have stated aloud or in writing their plans as stated above.

6) The bank's decisions regarding disbursement of these one-time payments are to be final, binding, and not subject to arbitration, provided that the bank actually releases each portion without restriction, to each individual within that two percent bracket of poverty by the end of one calendar year past the date of this fund's 200th anniversary who meet the criterion detailed in Paragraph Four of this document.

7) The remaining accumulated funds are to be entrusted to the bank to repeat this process unto eternity.

Should any one or more of these conditions be unacceptable to or not honored by this bank, it is directed that the enclosed funds be sent intact with this document, to nearest legitimate banking competitor as described above.